Epaphroditus was true to the meaning of his name: “lovely.” But bringing a gift for Paul 800 miles from Philippi to Rome nearly killed him (v. 30). He was distressed to think of the effect the news of his illness would have on his brethren who had sent him (v. 26), but God had mercy on him and he regained his health. God also had mercy on Paul because it would have been “sorrow upon sorrow” for him had he died: sorrow to lose this dear brother on top of the sorrow of seeing him so ill and distressed.

Sorrow can be self-centered, but in the case of these two men it was unselfish. Paul might have used his gift of healing (cf. Acts 19:11–12) to wipe away the tears but evidently knew this was not God’s will, something so-called faith healers should ponder. When Epaphroditus recovered, Paul sent him back home, sorrowful of course to lose his company but less so because he knew his brethren would be glad to receive him alive and well.

Earlier in this letter Paul wrote of himself that to die would be “gain,” for it would mean “being with Christ,” which is “very much better” (1:21, 23); but he knew the sorrow and loss that those left behind feel when a loved one departs this life. He was much affected by the troubles others encountered.

Do we need to re-evaluate the way we think about one another’s feelings? This is not to encourage a victim culture—Paul’s own example guards against that (vv. 14–18)—but to learn what he learned when the Lord Jesus said to him from the glory, “Saul, Saul, why dost thou persecute me?” (Acts 9:4). Yes, our Lord sympathizes with us when we sorrow (Heb. 4:15), for we are members of His body on earth (1 Cor. 12:27); and He knows sorrow Himself because He was “a Man of sorrows” when He was here (Isa. 53:3).